The concept of seduction affects everybody and some psychologists even argue that it is a very valuable life skill. The real benefit of mastering seduction stems in achievement and self-satisfaction. However, seduction is not only limited to sexual pleasures.
Starting from the very moment we look at the screen, till we purchase products, services, brands or vote for our candidate. In the game of psychology, attention is the most valuable commodity. The good news about seduction is that there is potential for any person to become a master of the game. More like a skillset than natural talent, one needs only to turn practice to intuition.
History could show us the very beginning of seduction. According to the book by Robert Greene – The Art of Seduction, it was women who invented seduction. Some of the first great seductresses include Cleopatra and Helen of Troy, each leading a man astray through their captivating visage and inexorable charm.
In our modern society, we are saturated in seduction by politicians, marketers, and even by our social circles. All of them striving to fulfill our unmet needs and hidden desires. In some cases even engineering new desires, by distorting our self-image or making us feel incomplete, they create a need for a superfluous product – such as more compact technology or a new fragrance. We are mostly victims of seduction.
Psychiatrist Rajendra Persaud claims that life itself is seduction and we need to seduce the world and people in it. He presents an important psychological model with phases including attention, interest, and maintenance. It requires different skills depending on which phase we’re in. Taking his/her attention, creating interest and maintaining it – even in the 40 years of a successful marriage! This means that the cycle is reoccurring over and over in long-term seduction.
It seems that the advice of being yourself before going out with your Tinder’s match doesn’t apply. Robert Greene also mentions that to be a good seducer, we need to find something seductive about ourselves. Next, the harder part is analyzing and understanding how to create a spell and reducing suspicion and resistance. It doesn’t need to be applied solely in our dating lives but can be applied in every aspect of our social interactions. To be considered as the game of psychology , there has to be distance and closeness at the same time, one needs to develop certain skills to make their wishes happen.
In other words, getting is giving and Rajendra Persaud explains it as: ‘the heart of a life is transactions’. Starting by praising confidence and developing listening skills later on until finally understanding the needs of the opposite side. Good seducers are also fearless of failures, this gives them an advantage when approaching any situation. By the words of one of the best-selling authors in the area of seduction, Chen Lizra: ‘Seduction is a skill set containing untapped power which one is not using but wants to unleash’.
Easy to say but hard to do!
Getting your first positive results is going to take more than a few Fridays. Perhaps that’s why the number of seducers is lower than the number of their victims. In our dating life, psychiatrists like Rajendra Persaud point out that Tinder and similar Apps are destroying the idea of seduction, resulting in their users slowly losing the skill. But they didn’t take into account the pandemic!
Using Tinder is like swimming in murky waters and can really affect our mental health. Trying to share our perfect pictures leads to creating high expectations which, unfortunately, might lead to some unpleasant surprises. In the case of poor feedback, self doubts could arise to force us into pursuing goals that aren’t important, such as capturing a perfect photo. So again, we are seduced by dating apps’ user experience to spend more time there instead of focusing on unleashing our seductive character.
Becoming a good seducer will require more than reading books, attending workshops, and copying somebody’s behavior. It’s considered an art so it ought to be performed from the heart. We as individuals need to come up with a strategy to embrace seduction and then seduce the world around us!
Pavol Mačejovský
